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The Four Mess-cateers

Do you know the four bed-fellows that can keep you stuck, drain your energy, and shrink your life to just what is safe, acceptable and a good deal less than exhilerating?

If you think fear is one of them, you’re close but don’t light that cigar. Fear is related to The Four. It arises from them. Lurks behind them. Masquerades as their driver. But, they need no driver. They are powerful entities that inhabit your mind all by themselves.They are: Guilt, Shame, Blame and Disdain.

Some distinctions for you:

Guilt springs to life from the belief that you’ve done something bad and caused someone pain.

Shame crashes the party with the thought that you are something bad.

Blame arises from the conviction that someone or something ‘out there’ did something bad and caused your suffering.

Disdain is born of the judgment that he, she or it is a essentially bad.

I call this quartet of quashers the Four Mess-cateers. They mess with your health. They mess with your relationships. And they mess with your Self-worth. Guilt and Shame cause you to shrink, to crawl, to grovel, to hide, to play small, to stay silent, to hang your head and creep through your life, in anticipation of punishment. Blame and resentment cause you to swell, to inflate, to become self-righteous and blind. They shut down your heart and stop up your ears. They drive you through life waiting for someone to say sorry. They bleed out your joy.  All of them cut off your ability to be fully engaged in this beautiful world.

They bankrupt your soul.

And… they are all LIES.

They are the narrowest slivers of life that your conditioned beliefs, and restricted perceptions, have allowed you to see of the gorgeous kaleidoscope of human greatness and love that you’re swimming in! They are the incomplete half-truths of your experiences. They are the smoke-screens that fog up your vision. Take off those blinders and you’ll see:

Your life is a master-piece!

Your genius is alive!

You are magnificent!

I wish so badly that you come to know yourself in this way! You deserve it! Your families need it. Your life-force depends on it.


Love on,



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